Notes from The Grimoire: Turning the Page on July 2025
Tap here to jump down to the TL;DR
I can't even lie about how surprised I am that it's time for another one of these already, what a short four weeks it's been! In a way I'm glad, I'm really over the Summer heat —and the humidity has been brutal this year.
Oops —My intention was to publish this on the final Friday of the month, but I didn't realize until I went to schedule it that the 31st is Thursday, not Friday... So, here we are.
Let's get into it.
The Scrolls: A Review
My PACT for July was:
I will review my budget twice a week for 4 weeks.
Here’s how it went:
Purposeful
Did I stay connected to my 'why'?
Yes. I want to reduce my anxious avoidance and make this a lasting habit. Ultimately, my goal is to build more financial knowledge in order to better insulate myself and provide for my family's future, taking the time to cultivate a healthier relationship with finance is an important foundational step in that pursuit.
Actionable
What specific steps did I take?
I used The Pebble to make this achievable by reducing the goal to simply opening my budget application. Calling that the win gave me the motivation to review and update information when needed— which, it turned out, it wasn't always!
This simple review process not only kept me informed of my progress toward spending caps and savings goals, but reflecting on my 'why' also helped me stay motivated on days when it just felt like a boring, tedious chore.
Continuous
How consistent was I?
On a scale of 1 to 5, I'd give myself a 3. Good enough, but could be better.
Where did I struggle? (or what derailed me?)
I was hoping to fall into a routine of checking on certain days at a relatively even cadence, but I did not. So, while I did complete the basic objective twice a week as intended, there were weeks where it was two days in a row and then not at all for another five, rather than a more even split across the week.
Also, while it has improved (my heart rate is in the high-80s as I'm writing this section, markedly better than the 100+ of the day I decided to create this PACT), it's still anxiety inducing enough to trigger some mild avoidance. I have caught myself in silly excuses several times.
I've also come to realize that it isn't just anxiety that causes this, it's also a dry and boring task in a simple spreadsheet-like interface.
Why do I sound surprised? I like doing a lot of things many ADHDers find boring, like reading studies and making spreadsheets, so the "classic" reasons aren't always my first-instinct when I'm troubleshooting why something seems to keep slipping through the cracks.
Lastly, this is very nuanced, but I set out to be transparent with the hope of helping others understand that they aren't alone, so here goes:
Another contributing factor to my budget avoidance at the moment is that, as a recent grad, I am unemployed. As much fulfillment, joy, and connection as I derive from the work I'm doing here, the fact is that it doesn't provide a consistent income (yet). So the continuity, consistency, and fluidity of our budget is thanks to my husband's job and, even though we're perfectly sound and made the decisions that got us here together, being dependent makes me feel guilty.
Trackable
Did I do it?
Yes. Not perfectly, but that's okay!
How did I track it?
Since it was so successful last month, I used a Loyalty Card.
An unexpected benefit of the Loyalty Card in this use-case, as well as last month's, is that it helps mitigate "the out of sight, out of mind" effect that can occur with tasks that exist solely in the digital world.
In the Garden
Tending the toolkit.
Watering (What's Working)
Update on Task Batching
It's always been a good strategy for me, and that hasn't changed. I'm still iterating on a weekly routine to find what works and is sustainable for lower energy levels, but batching tasks like researching for and scaffolding several pieces at a time, doing all the social media stuff in one block, and completing regular chores in a chunk of time instead of sprinkled throughout the day are all working well.
Update on the Ness Labs Community
I immediately found a home there with an emergent Personal Knowledge Management Collective. I've made some lovely new friends, and our meetups have quickly become a highlight of my week. It's been so nice to chat with everyone, nerd-out together, brainstorm, offer and seek advice —and not have their eyes glaze over when I talk about my systems!
Aside from these updates, my system remains much the same. Index cards are still working well, and VS Codium has become a solid pillar of my focused writing ritual. đź’Ş
Weeding (What's Not Working)
Cold-applying for Jobs
Having a non-linear career path, in an age where nearly every occupational gateway is guarded by a surly AI Bouncer, significantly reduces the effectiveness of the cold-apply process.
I am at my best in conversation with another human being, which can't happen if I don't make it into the room.
While I'm not stopping completely, as that's the nature of the beast and it would be just as counter-productive, I'm shifting my focus to networking by making connections wherever it feels appropriate, and presenting my skills as solutions in what feels more like a freelancer mindset.
Insecurity(?)
My application to present for Medium Day, which I planned to build around using the literary device of personification to name your struggles and synthesize the motivation to write, was recently rejected —and it brought up some complicated emotions. I'm not sure insecurity is quite nuanced enough to describe it, and neither does "taking it personally"; I didn't feel hurt, but for a moment it did cause me to question what I am creating here.
Ultimately, I know this work is important. Even if only to me (though I know from feedback that that is very much not the case). The worth of the knowledge I've gained, the connections I've made, and the ways in which this project is causing me to stretch out of my comfort zone are already beyond measure.
Isolation & Hyper-Independence
I don't know about you, but I tend to cocoon with my struggles. My particular brands of trauma and ADHD make me prone to hyper-independence, so I have been making concerted efforts not only to be more transparent with those around me, but to reach out for social support when I am struggling.
Maybe those last two don't exactly ring true as 'productivity strategies', but I challenge you to be consistently productive, maintain balanced mental health, and avoid burnout while these nuanced challenges run wild.
Insecurity feeds The Inspector (Perfectionism) and The Gatekeeper (Task Paralysis), while isolation and hyper-independence prevent me from leveraging one of the most powerful tools in my kit, The Anchor.
Planting (New Experiments)
Swimming
I love running, but it doesn't love me. Inevitably I injure myself right as I am getting into a groove, leading to a cumbersome and ineffective cycle. Fortunately, I also love swimming (in a swimming pool), so I recently called around to my local gyms to see if any of them have a swimming pool, and joined the one that did.
A Note on the ADHD Tax: I was able to join at a significantly reduced rate through a program offered by my health insurance. This program also has much less restrictive cancellation policies than if I had joined through the gym directly, so it could be well worth looking into.
One of my favorite things about swimming, aside from the fact that it's hard to feel gross and sweaty if you're in a body of water, is that it's pretty much a one-and-done form of exercise. I don't have to plan to target separate areas of my body to get a good workout —and I always feel good after a swim, so here's hoping this one sticks!
Networking
This is more of a cognitive reframe than a significant alteration of my approach to applying for jobs. Finding ways to connect on my terms, as well as learning how to describe my experience in ways that leverage my enthusiasm for systems, education, and community is not only forcing me to grow, but helping me feel the value in the infectious nature of the joy I derive from these things. In turn, making it feel less awkward to discuss openly, and I think that's good.
Marketing & Pinterest
Just this week I discovered that Pinterest has a wealth of free resources for online creators. I am exploring this avenue as a way to expand and strengthen my knowledge of the social media marketing world, and the potential of using the platform to broaden my reach.
The Workbench
Planning, building, and getting curious for the month ahead.
In the Works
Discord
The Discord server is almost ready! I'm still testing out some bot functionality and streamlining roles to make a comfortable experience for everyone, but I'm really excited to get that up and running soon!
I'm planning out a schedule that will include regular body-doubling (co-working) sessions, as well as some other community hangout activities that would be just for fun.
Posting Schedule
I'm working toward a twice-weekly posting schedule. So, in addition to my regular Tuesday installments on The League of Executive Dysfunctions, I'm planning to begin routinely publishing second pieces sometime between Thursday and Saturday. I haven't settled on a specific weekday, yet, and may experiment to see when they're most likely to reach you.
Look out for posts on my daily focus ritual, how I prevent hyperfocus hangovers, the tyranny of the word "should", and why I think traditional mental health screens often miss early signs that I might be struggling, among many other little article-seeds that have been growing behind the scenes!
Current Hyperfocus
Learning how and where to market my work in order to help the most people, and eventually to make it financially sustainable so I can give it more time and focus, without compromising my ethics. I can't stop thinking about it, planning experiments, considering new platforms and ways to incite curiosity, etc.
I keep hearing that the world I'm building with this body of work, and the sound education I'm seeking to provide, are profoundly unique and I think this is a bit of a gift and a curse. If you're able to connect me with anyone familiar with altruistic marketing, I'd be eternally grateful!
PACT for August
Continuing with a slight variation of my PACT for this month, my PACT for August is
I will review my budget three times a week for the month of August.
The way we budget isn't something I want to change, it's certainly not the software's fault that I have raging combined-type ADHD, but I've been employing The Magic Mirror lately to brainstorm some ways to add interest, and I think it's worth the continued focus to keep it going. I also think adding an additional check might help me find a rhythm, you know I'll let you know how it goes 🤞
That's the update. If you're facing similar struggles or want to talk more about any of the topics I've laid bare, please reach out, I'd love to hear from you. đź’Ś
✂️ TL;DR
The Goal (The Scroll): My PACT to review my budget twice a week was a success in terms of completion, but a struggle in consistency. The main culprits were anxiety, boredom with a tedious task, and the guilt that comes with financial dependency.
The Tools (The Garden): This month I'm "watering" my new swimming routine and a focus on networking. I'm "weeding" cold-applying for jobs and the feelings of insecurity and hyper-independence that hold me back.
The Plan (The Workbench): Looking ahead, the Discord server is almost ready, and I'm planning a twice-weekly posting schedule. My new PACT for August is to increase my budget review to three times a week to try and find a better rhythm.